Today during school assembly, my name was called out to receive a wedding gift by all SKTJ teachers. It’s a very big one, HEAVY too. Well, no need to guess, I know what’s inside (coz I asked for it? Haha). Thank you semuanya, colleagues and beloved students who came to my wedding. It’s a pleasure to have you all on my big day. Thank you again!
Now, I am at home actually, back from school an hour and half early coz I’ve got this Zoom-A Talk at 2. When I was driving home, I couldn’t help but kept thinking bout what I said to my Year 6 kids. After discussing English papers (Monthly Test) in class, I had a little chat with them, mostly we talked about my wedding day. I thanked them for coming to my wedding, giving nice presents, warm SMS wishes and etc. Then, I jokingly asked, ‘Hmm.. Teacher nk pindah ke tak ye? Awak rase camaner?’ Most of them said, ‘Tanak… Teacher jangan la…’ Even the naughtiest student said the same.. Some asked me to ulang alik from Muar to Sabak. Hahaha. Also, some were not responding verbally, but you could tell what they were thinking by looking at their faces.
I am seriously torn apart right now. I know I’ve asked opinions from lots of people around me, and mostly, I got quite the same answers; ‘ISI JE BORANG, DAPAT TAK DAPAT BLAKANG KIRA’. The way I see it, I think it’s better if I stay at least until the end of the year coz I don’t wanna leave my unfinished business here. I’m talking bout my Year 6 kids. I’ve taken care of them since last year, so I wanna know how good they are in English and how good I am as their teacher based on their UPSR result this year. As far as I know, this overseas-graduated teacher hasn’t really proven anything yet, I mean, a BIG one. No, not yet.
But at the same time, being apart from him (my husband), is sooooooo ……….. I’ve no words to describe it. What I know, it’s killing me. Some part of me keep saying, ‘Bila dah kawen, mesti la nk duduk dekat2 ngn suami kan? What’s the point kawen tpi nk duduk jauh2 pulak?’, but the other parts say, ‘Finish what you started with those kids, jgn menyusahkan org nk carik cikgu ganti pulak.. Kalau nk pindah, pindah ujung taon ni.. ‘ Again, some will reply back, ‘Ujung taon tu lame lgi kot….’
Clearly you see that I dunno know what to do here.